Sardar and lotto

              A Sardarji finds himself in dire trouble. His business has gone

bust and he's in serious financial trouble. He's so desperate that he 

decides to ask Bhagwan for help.

         He goes into the temple and begins to pray........... "Oh

Bhagwan, please help me, I've lost my business and if I don't get 

some money, I'm going to lose my house as well, please let me win the

     lotto".

         Lotto night comes and somebody else wins it.

         The Sardarji goes back to the temple.....................

"Bhagwan, please let me win the lotto, I've lost

my business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well".

         Lotto night comes and the Sardarji still has no luck!!

         Back to the temple..................

         "My Bhagwan, why have you forsaken me? I've lost my business,

my house, my car and my wife and children are starving.. I don't often 

ask you for help and I have always been a good servant to

you. Why won't you just let me win the lotto this one time so I

can get my life back in order???".

         Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the sky parts

open and the Sardarji is confronted by the

         voice of Lord :

         "SARDARJI, BUY THE DAMN TICKET FIRST".

               A Sardar took an   answering machine home and fixed it

   home somewhere in Rajasthan,but two days  later disconnected it

   because he was getting complaints like "Saala phone  utha ke

   bolta hai ghar pe nahin hai" (Idiot! He's taking the phone and

   saying he's not there.)

Sardar and the race  

               Once, a Hindu, a Sardar and an American were travelling in an aeroplane. Suddenly, something went wrong and the engines stalled. They had no parachutes with them. So all the three of them decided to risk their lives and jump out of their planes.

               First, the Sardar jumped out. He removed his turban, used it as a parachute and jumped. Using the turban he slowly floated down. Then the Hindu removed his dhoti and jumped out. Again his dhoti acted as a parachute and he also floated down gently. Seeing this, the American removed his shirt and pant and jumped out.

             Unfortunately, they did not do well as a parachute and he began to fall rapidly from the plane to the ground. He passed by the Hindu who said - " May Bhagwan help you".

             Then he passed the Sardar. The Sardar looked at the American zooming past him and was puzzled. So he said - "I see! You want a race! Let us see who is faster" Saying so, he let go of his turban.